Have you ever downloaded music or movie files from the Internet? It is so common to download and share them on the Internet in these days. Some people pay a little charge, but other people get them for free. There are laws that prohibit free-downloading of music and movie files on the Internet;however, some still download files for free. However, it is undesirable to download and share files for free on the Internet.
First of all, music and movies are private property. People agree that the property rights should be protected, but they only think of tangible products such as buildings and equipment. That's why many people download files without realizing they are property of others. Even though music and movies are intangible, they are also property of others because they are also created and produced with time and effort of others. As we pay for a house or a car, we should pay for music and movie files.
In addition, free-downloaded files are likely to infect computers with virus. Some people intentionally include virus when they upload or share music and movie files. When computers are infected, your private information can be exposed to others and stolen. If a company's computers are infected, the problem can be more serious. The confidential documents and idea can be stolen by competitors, resulting in significant loss on the company. Furthermore, it can affect customers of the company, creating confusion in the society.
Finally, free-downloading lower the quality of intellectual products. Artists and directors dedicate a lot of time, energy and effort to create a single song or movie. They should be paid off on their works. Regardless of the form of work, whether it is physical or mental, those who work should be paid off fairly based on their performance. If artists aren't be paid reasonably because people don't want to pay for intellectual property, they probably will not spend much time to create a masterpiece.
If we put ourselves in artists' and directors' shoes, we can easily understand why it is undesirable to download music and movie files for free. They are artists' own works and their private property. Like other property, intellectual property should be protected. Also, paying the fair price would be better for the society as well because it prevents unnecessary loss and deterioration in quality.
From Seonyoung Hwang to Yujin Song
ReplyDelete1. Does the essay have five paragraphs? Yes.
2. Does the essay have a thesis statement that identifies the writer's point of view? Yes, it clearly mentions the thesis statement.
3. Do the body paragraphs include topic sentences that support the writer's position? Yes.
4. Does the third body paragraph contain a counter-argument with either a refutation or a concession? No. The writer put additional topic instead of a counter-argument.
5. Do the details in the body paragraphs support stated in the topic sentences? Yes. The details are well organized and clearly stated.
6. Does the conclusion restate the thesis in different words, make a prediction, or state the issue in a broader context? Yes. The writer restated the outlook of her opinion.
7. Any suggestions? This piece of writing is well organized and has powerful supporting ideas to enhance the credibility of your topic as well as main point. I believe it'd be much more constructive if you add a counter-argument and refutation(or concession). Also, I'd like to suggest that if you could summarize your topics in conclusion it'll help the readers to follow the flow.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteTo Yu Jin Song From Ju Hye Choi
ReplyDelete1. What I like about this piece of writing is that the writer gives strong supporting details and thoughts.
2. Your main point seems to be that people are not aware of how serious and even dangerous this crime is and that if that people consider putting themselves in the artist’s or director’s shoes, they can understand better how disastrous this issue is.
3. These particular words or lines struck me as powerful: free-downloaded files are likely to infect computers with virus/ a line that convinces people to reconsider illegal downloading.
If we put ourselves in artists' and directors' shoes/ a line that allows readers to sympathize better
4. The one change you could make that would make the biggest improvement in this piece of writing is by making some changes in order to have a clearer introduction and by rephrasing or taking out repetitive words or idea such as ‘files for free.’ Overall, it was a pleasure to read :)
ReplyDeleteHave you ever downloaded music or movie files from the Internet? It is so common to download and share them on the Internet in these days. Some people pay a little charge, but other people get them for free. There are laws that prohibit free-downloading of music and movie files on the Internet; however, some still download files without paying for them. This is because they do not think they are property of others, and do not know how serious the issue is. Indeed, it is undesirable to download and share files on the Internet without charge.
First of all, music and movies are private property. People agree that the property rights should be protected, but they only think of tangible products such as buildings and equipment. That's why many people download files without realizing they are property of others. Even though music and movies are intangible, they are also the property of others because they are also created and produced with time and effort of others. Just as we pay for a house or a car, we should pay for music and movie files.
In addition, free-downloaded files are likely to infect computers with virus. Some people intentionally include virus when they upload or share music and movie files. When computers are infected, your private information can be exposed to others and stolen. If a company's computers are infected, the problem can be more serious. The confidential documents and idea can be stolen by competitors, resulting in significant loss on the company. Furthermore, it can affect customers of the company, creating confusion in the society.
Finally, free-downloading lower the quality of intellectual products. Some people say it would be beneficial for artists to share their works with many people, because their works can be more popular and well-known. However, artists and directors dedicate a lot of time, energy and effort to create a single song or movie. They should be paid off on their works. Regardless of the form of work, whether it is physical or mental, those who work should be paid off fairly based on their performance. If artists aren't be paid reasonably because people don't want to pay for intellectual property, they probably will not spend much time to create a masterpiece.
If we put ourselves in artists' and directors' shoes, we can easily understand why it is undesirable to download music and movie files without charge. They are artists' own works and their private property. Like other property, intellectual property should be protected. Also, paying the fair price would be better for the society as well because it prevents unnecessary loss such as virus infection and deterioration in quality of art works.