All around the world, there are many festivals and holidays like Halloween, Christmas, Thanksgiving Day, etc. These are famous and also very enjoyable holidays, but in Korea, the most important and the biggest holiday is “the Lunar New Year’s Day.” This is the first day of the first lunar month, and the purpose is to remembering the dead relatives so people prepare many foods to offer them. Therefore, the Lunar New Year’s Day is regarded as one of the most important holiday in Korean society.
Before celebrate the Lunar New Year’s Day, people prepare a lot of foods, for example, ‘Tteokguk’, ‘Galbi’, and ‘Japchae.’ Especially, the ‘Tteokguk’ is considered as the important food in the holiday. Because eating a bowl ofTteokguk means grow a year older. To prepare these kinds of delicious foods, firstly, they go to the market and get some fresh ingredients. And then, cook! This takes a whole day because it is the food that all relatives are enjoying during the holiday so it has to be cooked a lot.
At the day of Lunar New Year’s Day, people having ancestor memorial rites and visit their ancestor’s grave. In the early morning, they perform ancestral rites with a table spread with ritual foods which are prepared before. Next, they eat ‘tteokguk’ for a breakfast. After eating, they perform a new year’s bow to their families and relatives, saying “happy new year.”And also, people visit their ancestor’s grave. They make a small table spread with ritual foods, and make a deep bow in front of the grave.
After the all ritual, people enjoy rest of the holiday with their families and relatives. Because they meet after a long interval, they talk each other and enjoy the time together with happiness. For example, many people spend the time playing ‘yut’, or ‘flower cards’-the Korean traditional games. Like this, people enjoy rest of the holiday in various ways.
The Lunar New Year’s Day is the most important and delightful holiday in Korea. It contains Korean traditions, lots of delicious foods, and enjoyable time. But don’t lose yourself too much in the holiday season because after the holiday, may be you don’t want to go back ineveryday life.
Ahn Sang-wook
ReplyDeleteFirstly, this is a well-written writing! Following is some points I want to say.
1. The contents of the essay are properly divided following the structure the textbook presented. You wrote about the common scenery of New Lunar Year’s day, so most people who will read your writing agree with you.
2. It would be better if you specifically explain the foods you mentioned.
Presenting specific ingredients of the foods or the way to cook those foods will be good
3. I think you’re writing is quite monotonous. Your writing definitely described all the things related with the holiday. Those are very objective. Maybe readers will know what’s going on next while reading yours. I really know it is hard to find something like this, but it would be better if you include your personally related experiences of the holiday in the introduction.
4. A Grammar error: people having ancestor memorial rites and visit their ancestor’s grave.
I think two verbs are necessary, but only one can be found. I think ‘having’ needs to be changed to ‘have’
Your last conclusion is this: But don’t lose yourself too much in the holiday season because after the holiday, may be you don’t want to go back in everyday life.
I totally agree with your ideas! Again, it is very good writing! Thank you!
1.The thesis statement is 'Therefore, the Lunar New Year’s Day is regarded as one of the most important holiday in Korean society.'
ReplyDelete2. Yes, 'This is the first day of the first lunar month, and the purpose is to remembering the dead relatives so people prepare many foods to offer them.'
3. Yes, it firstly explained about the foods, secondly the memorial rites, and at last the tradition activity the family do during the day.
4. Yes, It was organized in a logical sequence. It follows the process of the day.
5. Body paragraphs have the facts and details. On the last body paragraph, you should write more details about the game they play. It is to concise to understand what they do on that day.
6. The writer put some evaluation about the day that this day is very important.
2nd draft
ReplyDeleteAll around the world, there are many festivals and holidays, like Halloween, Christmas, Thanksgiving Day, etc. These are famous and also very enjoyable holidays but in Korea, the most important and the biggest holiday is “the Lunar New Year’s Day.” This is the first day of the first lunar month, and it continues one day before and after the holiday. So the total day of the holiday is three days, and if it contains the weekend, it can be much longer. The purpose of the Lunar New Year’s Day is to remembering the dead relatives so people prepare many foods to offer them. Therefore, the Lunar New Year’s Day is regarded as one of the most important holiday in Korean society.
Before celebrate the Lunar New Year’s Day, people prepare a lot of foods. It has some differences between the houses and the regions because it is depending on a family tradition. But the common things are ‘tteokguk’, ‘Galbi’, ‘Japchae.’ Especially the ‘tteokguk’ is considered as the important food in the holiday. Because eating a bowl of tteokguk means grow a year older. To prepare these kinds of delicious foods, firstly, people go to the market and get some fresh ingredients. This is also important part of cooking because good ingredients can make a delicious food. And then, cook! This takes a whole day because it is the food that all relatives are enjoying during the holiday so it has to be cooked a lot.
At the day of Lunar New Year’s Day, people have ancestor memorial rites and visit their ancestor’s grave. In the early morning, they perform ancestral rites with a table spread with ritual foods which are prepared before. People make a deep bow to their ancestors. This is a ritual of the Lunar New Year’s Day. And then they eat ‘tteokguk’ for a breakfast. After eating, they perform a new year’s bow to their families and relatives, saying “happy new year.” Then the elder present money that given as a gift at the new year. Next, people visit their ancestor’s grave. They make a small table spread with ritual foods, and make a deep bow in front of the grave.
After the all ritual, people enjoy rest of the holiday with their families and relatives. In these days, they are too busy to see each other. So in the holidays, they can meet eventually. Because they meet after a long interval, they talk each other and enjoy the time together with happiness. For example, many people spend the time playing ‘yut’, or ‘flower cards’-the Korean traditional games. Like this, people enjoy rest of the holiday in various ways.
The Lunar New Year’s Day is the most important and delightful holiday in Korea. It contains Korean traditions, lots of delicious foods, and enjoyable time. But don’t lose yourself in the holiday season because after the holiday, may be you don’t want to go back in everyday life.